Like I said before, I don't get out much these days, but I have found myself paying more attention to what is being said around me. Yesterday, my daughter and I went over to my parents house to watch the olympics. As we were watching, we also talked about what was going on and made comments throughout our viewing. As they went to track and field events and the first women runners ran for the 100meters, my daughter made a comment about our olympic athlete looking like a man because her muscles were so large. Later, my mom made a comment about that athlete probably being a "dyke". As we continued to watch they talked about how this would be the last or only olympics for some of the athletes and I remember my dad saying something about how they would be too old when the next olympics rolled around. Each of these comments brought home different microaggressions and different "isms". There was sexism, LGBTism, and ageism. I was somewhat surprised by my daughter and how disgusted she was with the muscles the female runner had. She is an athlete herself and works very hard at her sport. I was terribly ashamed by the comment my mother made, it was so mean and hateful. And since when did age stop someone? These comments diminish the equity of these people, by making it wrong to be themselves. She is still a woman regardless of the size of her muscles and regardless of her sexual orientation. Some of these athletes will make room for new and younger athletes to compete and others will continue to work and come back in 2016 and perhaps show people like my dad that they are competitive at any age. This incident made me feel frustrated and ashamed. I am usually frustrated with my parents and the comments they make regarding most of the "isms" we have learned about. And I find myself wondering how I have such differing views when I grew up in their home. I also found myself becoming angry that they made these comments and that they believed they were true. In order for this to be an opportunity for greater equity, my parents would have to change their way of thinking and view of the world. I know that I can talk to my daughter about her comment and help her to see what her comment can do to someone.
Jodi,
ReplyDeletePeople are going to be judged no matter what. I liked the way you recognize the various microaggressions in your family’s discussion . Family member’s viewpoints tend to vary from person to person, with everyone thinking theirs is the correct one. You should see when my family gets together. You have no reason to feel frustrated and ashamed; you cannot help the way they feel. As long as you stay focused and stand strong for what you believe.